the farahway galaxy...

Saturday, September 23, 2006

It hurt....

She barely knew him. It had just been two months since they had known eachother. He was never very open with his feelings. Always had a smile on his face. He never revealed any thoughts of sadness or anger, if he had any that is....
She was a happy-go-lucky girl. Glad to have met such a friend who had always been lurking in the background for so many years...but came to the fore only when fate decided (albeit late) to bring them together.
Things were happy, warm, fun, rosy, exciting, funny,rockin until....until one day, he had to suddenly leave to bid goodbye to a very dear person. She wished she could be with him. Give him a shoulder to cry on. She wished that two months of a budding friendship would be enough for him to confide in her. She wished she could be there for him...when she knew she couldnt. And it was for more than a month, that not a day would go by without giving a thought to him...without thinking of what he would be doing or without thinking if he were okay....
And then he came back...same smile, same spirit!She'd sometimes think if there were more behind that smile. But he never let anyone doubt it. They partied, smoked, drank, ate good food. She really liked him and still does. Not in the way most people would think. She liked him more out of a deep sense of respect for him. His thoughts, his ways, his words were what she found so endearing. But he had come back, only to say goodbye to her and her friends. To leave one life and start another.
She wished she could tell him what she felt. She wanted to tell him that she would miss him a lot. But feared that maybe he would think two months was too short a time to have know him well enough to miss him. She wanted to shed a tear or two but feared that may weaken his heart. She wanted to tell him how much it hurt to say goodbye but feared that such words would hurt him instead. And thus it was, that she smiled, gave him a hug and wished him the best and saw him walk away.
She's a busy girl now. No time to do anything but work, work and work. No time to think of anything else but her tasks for the day. No time to get in touch with old friends. No time to do the laundry. No time to sit and reflect. No time to relax. No time to stop and breathe. Her friends complain that she's so busy these days. Her parents pity the state she's in. She's probably busy right now too. Perhaps in the midst of writing a 1000 lines of code. Probably has to rush for a lunch meeting with some important clients in half an hour. At the same time she's gotta pay bills, pay the house owner his rent, file her taxes and do another million things
and everyday. amongst all this chaos, her thoughts unfalteringly go towards him...